A Mentor Mom Story

When I was asked to give a “Mentor Mom Moment” (at a Mother's of Preschoolers meeting) I wasn’t sure what I should talk about. I think the only instruction I got was to be brief! I wondered if I should tell you about a good way I discovered to remove M&M’s from a 3-year old’s nose or maybe tell you something more profound and soul searching from my years of mothering.
Well, I decided to tell you about something sort of “in between.” I have two grown children, a boy and a girl. Both were and are wonderful, but I think it would be safe to say our little girl was a bit of a handful. She was bright and funny, but very determined. She could open child-proof caps and climb the drawers in the kitchen to get on top of the countertop. And she learned to tie her shoes when she was only 3 ½. When our kids were little my husband and I sort of morphed into a “good cop/bad cop” routine in so far as discipline goes. He was the fun guy who rolled around on the floor with them and I was the one who tried to make them behave. I don’t necessarily think this is the best way to do it, but I do think I know when we made this shift.
One evening I was (where else?) cleaning up the kitchen after supper and Steve was playing with the kids in the living room. All of a sudden, I heard a yelp from my husband and a big commotion going on. I went in to investigate and saw a very interesting sight: My precocious 2 year-old daughter, red faced and furious, staring up at her daddy. And my huge husband…he’s 6’-7” and a former football player staring right back at her, but he had more of a “dear in the headlights” gaze. I asked, “What happened?” and Steve said, “She bit me!” So, I asked him if he had given her a swat or what? He said, “Yes, but you won’t believe what she said.”…Well, I spent all day with her everyday…I knew her pretty well, but I asked “What?” anyway. He told me she seemed insulted and said: “Get that spank off my bo-bo!!”
Of course, I said, “You can’t let her get away with that! Give her another spank!” And he just sort of shrunk back and said, “No, no, I don’t think so.”
Part of the reason I tell you this story is to give you some hope. If you have a little one like mine was, you might be thinking “Oh, Lord, just let me get this kid raised!” or you may even wonder if you’ll battle for years and then have nothing in common when she’s grown. Well, I’m here to tell you there is hope! My little girl grew up to be one of my dearest friends. By now I’ve probably learned more from her than she ever did from me, and you all know her…Julia Ross Sullivan Lockhart!